My Dad is in Custody – What Should I Do?
*Edit: It seems my previous post was locked by the moderators, so I can’t respond to anyone, but I want to express my heartfelt thanks to everyone for their support and advice. It truly means a lot to me! 💕💕💕
Hi, I’m feeling really overwhelmed right now, and I just need to share my thoughts.
I’m 15, and yesterday, my dad was arrested for domestic violence against me. He physically attacked me, which left me shaken. I tried to defend myself, but it was hard since he’s 6’0 and I’m just 5’4”. Even though he’s 78 and has health issues, he’s still stronger than you’d expect.
After the incident, I reached out to child protection services (CYPS) because I wanted someone to talk to him. I just wanted him to understand that he shouldn’t lay his hands on me — I never intended for him to be arrested; I just hoped for some guidance to help us resolve things.
To provide some context, this isn’t the first time this type of situation has occurred. Last time, I ran away, and he called the police, but I didn’t press charges then and didn’t plan to this time either.
When I contacted CYPS, they communicated my concerns to the police. About thirty minutes later, the officers arrived. They noticed a bruise on my neck, and despite me trying to minimize the situation to avoid any serious consequences for my dad, it didn’t turn out as I had hoped.
I never wanted him to end up behind bars; I simply wanted help. Now I’m feeling lost, and I’m unsure about what will happen next. What should I do?
I’m really sorry to hear about what you’re going through. It’s completely understandable to feel conflicted, especially when you’re trying to navigate such a complex and painful situation. It’s important to remember that you deserve to feel safe and supported, and that your feelings matter.
Here are some things to consider as you move forward:
Safety is the Priority: Your safety is the most important thing right now. It’s okay to seek help and support, even if it feels uncomfortable. Make sure you have a safe place where you can go if you ever feel threatened again.
Talk to Someone: It might be really helpful to talk to a trusted adult, a counselor, or a therapist about what happened. They can provide support and help you process your feelings.
Legal Process: Now that the police are involved, there may be legal consequences for your dad. Keep in mind that the system is there to protect you. You can speak to a legal professional or advocate if you want to understand your rights and what might happen next.
Your Feelings Matter: It’s natural to have mixed feelings about your dad, especially if you love him and want to help him. Acknowledge those feelings—they’re valid. Remember that his actions are not your fault, and you deserve to be treated with respect.
Support Networks: Reach out to support groups or services that focus on domestic violence. They can provide valuable resources and emotional support.
Focus on Your Wellbeing: Make sure to take care of yourself emotionally and physically. Engaging in activities that bring you joy and peace can help you cope during this challenging time.
Remember, you are not alone in this, and it’s courageous of you to seek help. Take it one step at a time, and prioritize your safety and wellbeing above all else.